Thinking About Not Going to Hell

Leslie Jones McCloud
Apr 10, 2016 · 5 min read

Thinking About Not Going to Hell
A waking thought, I think is relevant. I awoke thinking that I cannot be caught dead in hell. I do not want to go to hell. According to all of the sermons I have heard and my own reading, it is easy to go to hell.
I liken myself to the criminal who believed Jesus as they all hung together on the cross. He wasn’t a good person, according to society, so much so that he was crucified. He realized he got what he deserved but Jesus was innocent but yet he hung from the cross as well. He heard the words of Christ and believed and was saved. That sounds about like me. On the outside, I may seem holy like Mary, Mother of Jesus or Mary the reformed harlot turned disciple and rumored wife of Jesus but guilt from my past activities and youthful indiscretions hang on me like robes. Jesus makes the difference. I stand accused of a long list of sinful activities. Satan accuses me in his role as Prosecutor/Persecutor and he is correct in his accusations. All of that evil was already in me and I didn’t even know it until it was demonstrated. Jesus says, “she belongs to me,” which makes me a sheep, not a goat. I look like roadkill. A mangled sheep. Jesus Saves.
There was no argument from me about the things I have done, I was there for much of it. Guilty like a criminal, I stand accused of my crimes against God and all that is Holy. Like the criminal on the cross, I believe Jesus when he says cast your cares on me and take my yoke for my burden is light. I do that, so I imagine to others, I appear to be unbothered by lots of things the devil has people doing to me. God sees this too. Pride goeth before a fall. Pride (false pride) is the source or doorway Satan uses to get to many of the people he uses. Satan is relentless which means pray without ceasing is real, hour by hour truthfulness that God has given us as one of our weapons against evil. Have you ever prayed without ceasing? I have but it is hard to do when I am interacting with people because I am distracted. I pray without ceasing best when I am at home with my children, interacting with them. Any single parent knows this is all the time. I spend all my time with my children, (except when I go to the grocery store because neither of my children really want to do all of that walking up and down the aisles and putting things back. They did when they were little but when they got old enough to understand they had a choice, they opted for the serenity of their rooms, sans Momby — my name for myself when I feel as if my children are taking advantage of my kindness — instead of walking around a variety of stores, doing stuff for at least three hours.)
This was not always my life, sedentary and raising kids alone but it probably is the narrowest path I have taken, which leads to Heaven. Hell would not be good for me because all of the stuff I hate — like having heathens direct my steps and try to tell me what to do when they clearly do not know what they are talking about and people who live life out loud and so far out of their wheelhouse that the ridiculousness of it is shocking. Satan has them looking so stupid. Stupid puppets. If a person like me can see what you are doing, you really are naked and stupid and have absolutely no authority over me that I, or anyone else who matters, will recognize. Naked, in heavenly terms, means without any good deeds in which to clothe yourself. In other words, being asked to leave the Wedding due to improper dress. However, on this Earth, these machinations equal annoyances. Imagine being constantly annoyed. (The writers of Seinfeld say you look busy if you appear annoyed.) Being a mother has grown my patience even longer that it had been already. I do have stopping points where I demonstrate the wrong way to behave when anyone is trying my patience. I do not like dealing with stupid puppets but I used to be one so I suppose I am paying my dues. Crikey it is annoying. I remember what the Bible says: demonstrate with lovingkindness the principles of God instead of saying, blaming and being mean about it so that the Kingdom of Heaven experiences increase. It is a work in progress for me.
Imagine what Jesus puts up with — the Father watching us disobey over the centuries and saying the same things to us over and over again. What a view from above. The perspective of God is demonstrated in how we interact with each other, our children, co-workers, bosses (those who have clear authority over a part of your life). All I ask is for the ones who operate as heathens to stop operating as such. Let God have authority over you and your actions so we can all learn together without so much fighting and ignorance and unwise decisions. If you really want to know where you stand with God, ask Him. He will get with you. Out-of-the-blue incidents will occur to get your attention and answer your question. Yes, that is what I did. I do that on an irregular basis because I had to be sure I wanted to know.
My current lesson is demonstrating loving kindness as Jesus demonstrates to all of us. I fail at my demonstrations when it means the most. It is easy to be kind to those who you love and already care for but what about people who clearly have Satan operating within them and they are targeting you? Evil is beguiling mostly, not exceptionally shocking. Evil enters through the doors of evil within all of us. Think seven deadly sins of “hubristic pride, greed, lust, malicious envy, gluttony, wrath and sloth” juxtaposed to the seven virtues prudence, justice, temperance (meaning restriction or restraint), and courage (or fortitude); and the three theological virtues, from the letters of Saint Paul of Tarsus, are faith, hope, and charity (or love)” that we are to demonstrate. (Thanks, Wikipedia. Links are to be followed because that is how we learn.)
Our lesson is to learn to recognize what is Good, according to God’s perspective and what is evil according to God’s perspective. That is the plan I will work to keep out of Hell.
Because I am on a narrow path and finally keeping all of the commandments, I am getting used to living my entire life a different way. I have a long way to go, don’t get too close. Would you really want to enter the room of Linda Blair’s character in the Exorcist if you knew what you were seeing? Really? Don’t get too close, it is like a construction site over here.